Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Just feel more then suppose

Today , i saw you a couple of times ... i just wanna walk away ... idk why ... after that saw u again ... you called me and talk rubbish... but at least u did ... i wonder what you are thinking ... i just wanna get back to before... or even more ... why does it always have to be like that... i know its wrong .. but i just wanna get myself like before... i do not know how to explain such a psychological mood... i wanna just ask you ... but ill pray until one day it comes to what i want ...

Monday, May 09, 2011

I wanna be there

Hold me in your arms tonight , i can be your hero baby. i can kiss away the pain . i will standby you forever. you could take my breath away. would you swear that you will be mine ? have i lost my mind? i dont care you're here tonight. my love is a thousand miles that will never end, cos you are the power to my life. you control every cell that makes me hold on every second i look into your eyes.
I will live more to see your smile . i will standby for you forever .Baby im addicted. i'd give you showers of love. just to have a glance at you. A smile you gave kills the pain in me. look in me forever. i;m outta control. you are the drug that keeps me from dying. you're the only reason im tryin! how i wish i could tell all this to you? is it possible. i think of you outta fingers. a think of you like a blink of my eyes. you always keep me breathing. i do not wanna lose a second to see you .

Sunday, May 01, 2011

STRESS

This few days keep diao at home study arh. will die de uh! everyday study . think can go raffles liao luh! but actually its quite fun. the life is so much diff from what i used to have, some people say its better but i still miss the old times hanging out here and there, laughing here and there! but its all over. everything always draws it line somewhere, so if u think you and your best friend is so happy now. think again,. it'll soon be over...
But i always used to think . Friends always cross your path. but best friend walks with you till the end. It has always remained the same. No gain no change

Thursday, April 28, 2011

I used to have something i do not ever thought of

You guys bring out the best in me , i swear. a perfect line to explore among. Thanks . but you've all crossed and left my path. Thats a truth that could never be a lie. i believe it'll never be mine again. from the truth of who you are and what you do. that's not a life i would want to treasure. i need someone to cross my path together . learn together from the past experiences and learn to have a better future. though i admit i always had wanted it so fucking badly. i had to admit. "you" exceptionally brought out the best in. i SWEAR! you bring the smile on me when i frowned . You made me laugh whenever i did not feel like. i used to treasure this too much and did not realize how i have been treating my other friends and studies. i had to make sure you were happy. till i realize the neglect i have tremendously thrown aside. i miss the (you) . thats will only be left as memories i guess. i'll always remember i used to had a best funny guy friend. too bad too sad. nothing can change that was long time settled. i can see who other left my path. one that never left me in side. i believe. but its not the right way i guess too. Its always suppose to meant the other way. you have someone else not supposedly to me. you should treasure. i admit i needed you there sometime. but selfishness is not suppose to be in consideration. i know what to do. it might be selfish but i have no choice. Not now but later. i need time . true friends stay by you but others just crossed your path like a way to walk home. true friends are like jewels, hard to find but very very rare, fake ones are like fall leave founded all over , i had to admit. but now i needed to do what i needed to do.

Secrets

i wish i could tell it someone , it isn't something someones like to hear. feels weird all the time. saw what you wrote. heard what you've said. i wanna tell you all, it seems impossible cos u're ain;t the one that was for me. the way you show the way you act.
I miss the way you where. laughter , many things memorable . i miss the old. i hate the new. what a tragic to have such a wonderful person in my life. everyone change. didn't used to be you but i gotta say that you started being someone else. i wanna end all of this for awhile. im being a burden . i cant afford it once more. i could not but i need to say i want it badly. But its not now. u're taken. you chose the road to take. i tried hard to combine . but things change. i need to learn . but you took a better road. a happy ending . and i hope you guys will hold on till the very end. luck and wishes to you guys. im not making much more trouble soon. but not now, i need time to let go ... perhaps u'll see the light next time. i may be hated but i hope that you will see what i truly mean. because its all for you. ain't anyone else.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

A Chance

 Chances are made by yourself, chances are also earned by yourself.Chances can be hard to earn but takes seconds to destroy. Thinking makes chances go. Trying makes chances, You always try , i do see i do know, so i would not throw.  a simple meaning shows how much it means. you'd never know . an eye could tell something easily by seeing right through it. Thanks for those i know it and ill never leave it at side . but hardwork come's from you not me. until i see the light one day because i always say . i needed a friend not needed friend(s)

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Growing weaker everyday

everytime i on my phone, something will definitely happen. everytime i talk to you. you seem to always give me the same attitude. im so tired of holding on to this friendship much le. i cant hold on much longer already. how i wish i could tell you. but i think u should slowly realise it youself bah.
I dont wanna kpkb anymore le... its useless. you dont see it. try putting yourself here. i guess you already die already,. perhaps you have too many good friends around you. im just like a small air , appearing nothing to you. idw to say anymore. or i really wanna tear it all out... goodbye

Friday, April 22, 2011

A Reflecting Trip

Through this trip, i've seen many things. I see pain , i 've seen many ups and downs of people.
and i've figured out how do all this can be applied to my life.

People change , thats unchangable. It only matters how the party sees u in it. if he does not see it, no matter how high u climb. There's not gonna be any hope. I've just realised i've climbed how high and i did not realize my friends had fallen off long time ago. now i realize its still changable. now i have 2 routes to choose from. Take how long i climb up , and climb back down and bring my friends back and climb on again. Or just simply continue climbing without any hesitations. im still thinking of a solution, haven't came out any but soon. Real friends wait. fake friends ran away. Thats absolutely true. A trip can change many people's thinking towards things. perhaps good or bad i don;t know . but i shall try. but its much better than not trying. leaving a cup of water on its own , will it not breed dengue? it applies much to anything. if you tickle me, will i not laugh? if u love me ,will i not love you back? if u poison me, will i not not die?

Friday, April 15, 2011

A better experience to see alone

Truthfully , i'm no one right now. i can see things much clearer. Just feel so empty this few days.
Felt like a piece of my heart just dispatched somewhere else. The feels no longer there.
Good things is , i'm no longer waiting for a better life. well i'm now just hoping to see it.
Just feel that , why can't you be so heartless. even an animal can feel a love its owner puts in.
I've put in much more i could thought of. No rejections to any things you'd like. But it always end up the same.
Everyone's changin in their own ways. People live with a better perspective. As for some . Once Someone thinks you're worthful or helpful. You take advantage of eating more. Taking over spaces of other people. You like to be a star? travel the world then , not here. wanna do ur business? do it somewhere else. You;re making a much bigger fool of yourself here. Things change people change . Friends come and go. Best friends drifts. This is not within your control. One quote to summarize all this A man is called selfish not for pursuing his own good, but for neglecting his Closest."

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

A morning to realise its gone

Through so much , im not feeling any better,
what u say , i could hear, what they say ,i know
used to think its okay . but now its not
Believing u wouldn't , but u eventually did
Try hard to mend things , didn't work.
A real friendship could tear me down.
Only me thinking this was real, u didn't
You had much fun using me.
i gave what i could , i tried what i can.
when ever you needed im there. even when
you do not needed too.
Im tired. im suffering hard.
Now its all too late. it'll much never be like last time
Friends come and go
i have to learn to take a grip and learn to let things go.

A solution i cant think of

i once had afew best friends ,
they left. im alone. there's just a person that breaks all of us. he/she might take over my place in ur hearts. i don;t know. but what i know thats starting to happen. i cant see anyone who's true to me. its always like this. Startings a star.endings are a moon. where u cant find urself. The grass is always greener on the other side. how i wish u could  treasure me like before. i'm trying to be hard. ill once wait for you to ask me to be your only friend

I'm so tired after so much

You left and came back changed . even a blind men can see,
Perhaps a better view for other unlike me. A change in every bit.Piss me off everytime.
I can see i can hear i can feel. i know what i know. You are what u are . if u think this will work i'll answer ,no.
Obvious t me maybe others. eyes are around. Maybe using me perhaps. i don't know. i dont want to be paranoid and might misuderstand you. whats ur intention? i cant see. you dont show no one can see. what i see is a very evil side of you. i bear and wait. what will be the outcome, im not ready. but i cant see anything. im lost in somewhere that makes me depressed.
I might wait, till when? u might try? show to who? i can't see. im willing to do it all. are u willing to show that small token t me? what ever the start is always beautiful. did not expect such to happen. all this is all unpredictable. i promise ill wait and initiate all the time. but when my time comes . you better be ready. i dont know when. i just keep this as a deep secret,. no one i've shared but im well-prepared to. treasure or dont cry when its gone.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Nature's Path

Just Came back from ahma's place . Had during the one day. Heading down to  town for dinner at "The Cafe Cartel" with my aunty. And would be back at night! Yea feel happy during this few days. At least better than before. I hope this happiness would never end. and unknowingly the people around me are also happy too! Thats so great to know man! Hahaha yeah! I like that !Yeah another hour i would be heading down to town liao!

Byes People. Remember to take care of yourselves. The rain is now acidic due to the Japan Explosive gases, The air now is acidic , So take good care of yourselves and pray for Japan to get back up on their Feets!


Bryan

Friday, March 11, 2011

And Express from me to you guys

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A Day to wake up knowing you all weren't talking

Finally woke up now. had a silly dream. By myself in a diff world and was with 2 of my besties. Seeing them gone one by one aches me till my death there. We had played fun and did many things but in the end it was a painful ending. It tells me to treasure all the fun before you regret , i guess? hope happiness of you guys last forever and not be a replay of my dream. Best wish for all the broken hearts.
remove the arrows in them and make them become a heart that it used to be .Because thats what a heart is meant for .


Bryan

Another day to look forward to

Just came back from slacking . Haish, Sian man! i got so many hw and yet and uncompleted. Hope tomorrow got better things to do. Gonna visit my ahma on sunday-tuesday. Gonna be fun! Hehehhe hope to buy more things, Yea! Hmmm... Now at least im happier then before ! Hope that it'll be gone soon. Haish. today also so many things happen, should i be sad or try to be happy. Hmmm when ill get easily affected when someone gets sad,
   Thats life, Gotta go on even though the road is harsh. Taking all obstacles as a stone. tossed it and continue with more obstacle faced. Yeah! thats right. The hardest decisions in life were never easy, Trust or not trust, Your decision, Take a deep breathe and think through whats right and wrong. If you think its worth doing things you've never thought of. Do it. Regret is a tragedy.
  I've learned, to be fighting strong when its the weakest and most dropped-down part of your life. Being weak together at the sweakest part of your life only shows that u are mentally weak. You just sit there and let tears take over the situation.Let the strength of yours push down the stress and get over it, And start afresh .



Bryan=)

Thursday, March 10, 2011

A Day With Lights

Today sch was fine. Finished my history retest^^ then went back and changed and went out to slack. So fun! too much to laugh about. Hope it'll be like that for awhile. Tomorrows its gonna be sci test on particulate models and AMI. Hope ill do well. Ill study. but for now its time for maple. ! ^^


Bryan

Wednesday, March 09, 2011

A Refreshment

Another Day playing hard!
Sch was quite sian today , and after sch went home and change and went down to ahtan's house .
Haish! Now im playing maple! Its hard to level up man :) Trying hard! After that ill go read up on my sci notes. And go for a hu. And Time to sleep. And tomorrow wake up and will be a better refreshment!

Bryan♥What comes around goes around

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Today Was a fairytale

Today leaning journey was not too bad lurh. After that went home and change and all. And then went down and find Ahtan and slacked around till 7 and we went home after sending ruichen home :)
  Hmmm i;m so tired.! i wanna sleep soon le! Yeah thats all im bery the tired. Blog again tomorrow i go toh le!


Bryan

Monday, March 07, 2011

Another Day to Experience!

Today was another normal day out after my learning journey, Went to west mall theater to watch "Gnomeo and Juliet".
It was a boring show. i slept half of the movie! My teacher was actually just sitting behind me sial! Chua tio!Hahahah! after that went back school to do some reflection. After that , went to slack with Ruichen and ahtan! WOOO! was fun! they pei me go home and change! Wahahah! Another happy day! but some thriple sided faced or more etc etc! people spoil our mood!
  
   Heheheheh ! Hope tomorrow will be a better day! Two more weeks han come back le! Yay! damn happy! i can't wait to see him Botak! Yay!

    Tomorrow school's gonna be boring with ILJ(i lanjiao) again! Hope tomorrow will be much better!


Bryan!

Sunday, March 06, 2011

The Worst Dream Of My Life Was Today!

I was taking a nap just now.
Guess what i dreamt? I forgot some of the parts. but i clearly remember is. , I was in the bus . i kinda went to the back few seats. and one of my friends was far infront. we kinda quarrel. I was pissed so i decided to take a nap also in that dream. Its just the two of us at the bus. When i woke up. I saw a guy infront of her. I looked at her. She looked at me and pointed at that guy. He turn over. Know what i saw? I saw HAN!i could clearly remember he was wearing a black shirt . Botak also.. I see liao i straight away cry sia! i ran infront! i just Fly over to him. I kept asking why u come out never tell me ..i coulnt clearly remember but. He was with a few other friends.. I was alittle pissed so i walked away. He just kept tearing... i was disappointed so i walked back to my seat at the back... i kept tearing and tearing... Fk shit man! Then i woke up and realise i was at bed! without him around le! the feeling sucks like kns! I could still clearly remember that face i've seen. I guess its just keeps haunting me ....

Saturday, March 05, 2011

A Song That Tells What i Feel


最怕空气突然安静
zui pa kong qi tu ran an jing
最怕朋友突然的关心
zui pa peng you tu ran de guan xin
最怕回忆突然翻滚
zui pa hui yi tu ran fan gun
绞痛着不平息
jiao tong zhe bu ping xi

最怕突然听到你的消息
zui pa tu ran ting dao ni de xiao xi
想念如果会有声音
xiang nian ru guo hui you sheng yin
不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
bu yuan na shi bei shang de ku qi
事到如今
shi dao ru jin
终於让自已属於我自已
zhong yu rang zi ji shu yu wo zi ji
只剩眼泪还骗不过自己
zhi shen yan lei hai pian bu guo zi ji

突然好想你
tu ran hao xiang ni
你会在哪里
ni hui zai na li
过的快乐或委屈
guo de kuai le huo wei qu
突然好想你
tu ran hao xiang ni
突然锋利的回忆
tu ran feng li de hui yi
突然模糊的眼睛
tu ran mo hu de yan jing

我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
wo men xiang yi shou zui mei li de ge qu
变成两部悲伤的电影
bian cheng liang bu bei shang de dian ying
为什麽你
wei shen me ni
带我走过最难忘的旅行
dai wo zou guo zui nan wang de lu xing
然後留下最痛的纪念品
ran hou liu xia zui tong de ji nian pin

我们那麽甜 那麽美
wo men na me tian , na me mei
那麽相信
na me xiang xin
那麽疯 那麽热烈的曾经
na me feng, na me re lie de ceng jing

为何我们
wei he wo men
还是要奔向各自的幸福
hai shi yao ben xiang ge zi de xing fu
和遗憾中老去
he yi han zhong lao qu

突然好想你
tu ran hao xiang ni
你会在哪里
ni hui zai na li
过的快乐或委屈
guo de kuai le huo wei qu
突然好想你
tu ran hao xiang ni
突然锋利的回忆
tu ran feng li de hui yi
突然模糊的眼睛
tu ran mo hu de yan jing

最怕空气突然安静
zui pa kong qi tu ran an jing
最怕朋友突然的关心
zui pa peng you tu ran de guan xin
最怕回忆突然翻滚
zui pa hui yi tu ran fan gun
绞痛着不平息
jiao tong zhe bu ping xi
最怕突然听到你的消息
zui pa tu ran ting dao ni de xiao xi
最怕此生已经决定自己过
zui pa ci sheng yi jing jue ding zi ji guo
没有你却又突然
mei you ni que you tu ran
听到你的消息
ting dao ni de xiao xi

Rememberence

Tired of Playing Games le ,

Taking some look at facebook and spotted some memories AGAIN. and again and again. Its just everywhere! can i delete everyone inside ?! Hates and pains me to see all those things again.Trying to let go. But evidently i can't. Is not a big fuck or wad but i just can't seem to let it fly away together with the wind.
It keeps sticking on me no matter how a thousand times i try to flick it away. Is it mean't to be like this or ?
I really cant figure it out ..Mmmm someone help me out. Or no one can do that ? I guess the best answer still cant be spoken.
I guess this few song really makes me feel WORST! but its still really good songs. I'll upload some memorable pictures ... No choice but its the best way to vent it all out ...

Earl's Grey

Fresh Morning :D
Wake up and saw my breakfeast. And now playing Maple. Tired of retraining. But i'm doing good. Cos it keeps me busy and not really much time to emo ;D So people don't Worry! aha! i'm doing fine!

Yeah maybe later going to ama house later! Arbo maybe going out if anyone asks me to :) ^^ ! Nothing much to say. Working on my cbox now^^ so can make some comments :) Looking forward Later !


Bryan

i'll remember this!





One Big Family!No leave, No change !

WTF?!

Look at me ?! i look like a monster! Wahh! My sunburn is tearing like siao lehh ...Eeeaks i look damn like a monster! My face also tio :( Wa lao! Tian uh!
  Im seriously bored! Looking at the sky. Makes me even more bored. Remember ugly memories makes me sad. What to do ? Go get some fresh air i say . Hmmm maybe bahh... Ill go out for awhile or else i will start thinking about stupid things again -'- ill go bathe and get ready to go out .
what to do?! so .... ill go bathe now . Appreciate My new Blog Thanks :) Ill upload some pictures when i'm free=)

Bryan -

3/3/2011

A beautiful Night ,
Just woke up . Back home. And have done making this blog. Listening some memorable songs. Still got a little more to go. Guess ill ask someone to help me do it better .

Maybe going out to meet some friends becos im really gettin a little bored at home playing with games..
I should get out and explore more things. Yay!:)

But still stuck in those days . Hard to forget. But gettin some help and i felt better . Just wished what i always wished. Hope it'll come through. I really hope so.

Should i start doing something else instead of gettin stucked in this nightmare, i wonder if i can do it alone but ill think of it. Hope ill come to a good decision. Hope you guys like my new blog ;D Pls prey that he'll faster come out if you know what i mean :) Good Luck!

Bryan

Friday, March 04, 2011

Nothin On You

Beautiful sunshine , beautiful air but moody mood :(
Wasted arh. Haish........ Days without laughter , joy, temper. Sucks! Cos now its all without you.
Trying to adjust myself to the new life with new people . Facing it alone but Its still quite okay . At least im happy here. Thats why i decided to write a blog to Vent everything here... And hope it helps.. But sad thing is becos u're not there to read it... Easy come easy go i've hear people said. For you its a easy come hard go.. Poeple told me lean to take a grip and learn to let go/// Sounds really Do'able ? But i don;t think so becos this is not a simple Task to complete.

Becos in s'pores 4 corner , You own all the places of memories. those cracks in my ipod looks really disgusting but i knew that its a memory hard to vanish. Everytime we quarrel just accumlates again and again. sad times are actually more memorable. The song u put in are just pain of memories about you. I guess this is the 1st week imm suffering,.. But its okay, good to know you're happy and protected. when you come back im really gonna die, i cant wait for that day to spent my day with angryness again. I miss them!

Im waiting for you to be here to share the pain with me , and we'll make it through tgether

Bryan ,

A week without you

This is the first week without , The day when i left i thought it was nothing . But when i started walking home myself... I could not control it... I just tear unconditionally ... I couldn't stop it... I decided to send you a farewell message...I just Kept tearing i couldn't control it but it was painful to leave you. Seeing you alone in somewhere where no one's gonna care u. And maybe u'll be tortured . I have no idea.

But now i knew that u're safe and sound. I knew u have a good friend there to keep a accompanied. It aches me but ill rather do it myself... But at least u're safe inside... I hope you'll remember me when you come out... I just tear everytime i see the songs and videos i had of you... those beautiful memories. Everytime we quarrel just accumulates to the memories and pain you gave me... Thanks for me memories. But i really miss you and hope to see u soon. The video You've made might be touching but i really hope you'll stay strong and get throught those pain... One by one u all go from me... I really hope it'll stop soon... I wanna get u guys back... Its not easy but i wonder whats wrong... I hope you'll get out and give me more memories cos i seriously dont like my life now... Its sucks. Ill really hope you go through thge pain and share with me when you're out. Tc Hia di .....

Bryan ♥Waiting for the day when you'll be back and suprise me